Indians tell Apple it will not get special tax treatment
Published in News


Apple staff need counselling

The Indian Government has told the fruity cargo cult Apple that it will not be a special tax case.

Apple close to buying Shazam
Published in News
Monday, 11 December 2017 11:48

Apple close to buying Shazam


More gimmicks

The fruity cargo-cult Apple, which has problems writing code which can tell the time accurately, is splashing out nearly half a billion dollars on a gimmick which allows Apple fanboys to identify which Coldplay or U2 single they are listening to by pointing their expensive iPhone at it.

Chromebooks go down big time
Published in News
Monday, 11 December 2017 11:30

Chromebooks go down big time

 

Tame Apple Press cheers

The Tame Apple Press is celebrating after Google experienced a huge stuff up of its Chromebook services.

"New" Apple bug lets outsiders fiddle with your house
Published in News


You probably weren't expecting this

Apple's Homekit has a bug which allowed people to not only open your front door remotely, but unlock your garage, switch your smart plugs off and on, and mess around with your thermostat.

Consumer Reports rubbishes iPhone X
Published in Mobiles
Thursday, 07 December 2017 12:42

Consumer Reports rubbishes iPhone X


iPhone 8 is better

US consumer group Consumer Reports has rubbished Apple’s iPhone X and claims that Jobs' Mob’s iPhone 8 was a better phone despite being much cheaper.

Huawei's Honor takes aim at youth market
Published in News
Wednesday, 06 December 2017 11:51

Huawei's Honor takes aim at youth market


Trick cyclists ahoy

Honor - Huawei's mobile phone company - held a massive event in the City of London yesterday and vowed to take on giants Samsung and Apple and beat them at their own game.

Ireland starts collecting back tax from Apple
Published in News
Tuesday, 05 December 2017 11:47

Ireland starts collecting back tax from Apple


Sort of

The Fruity Cargo Cult is starting to pay back tax in Ireland, despite the fact it has denied doing anything illegal.

Apple’s comedy programming strikes again
Published in News
Tuesday, 05 December 2017 11:30

Apple’s comedy programming strikes again


Novice security flaw patch destroyed by update

Apple’s comedy programming team has struck again and released a software update which undoes an emergency security patch which undid a security flaw which was so basic a toddler on crack would not have written it.

Apple’s Intel iPhone X much slower than Qualcomm models
Published in Mobiles


Users pay for Apple’s spat

Apple users are having to pay in terms of performance if they are stuck with an iPhone X with an Intel modem.

French stop surrendering to Apple
Published in News
Monday, 04 December 2017 10:38

French stop surrendering to Apple


Peasants fed up with being told to eat gateau

It seems that French peasants are revolting at the way that the fruity cargo cult - Apple - is being allowed to avoid paying tax while they are being told to eat cake.